For those of you wondering if I’d fallen off the face of the earth… here’s what’s been happening. 💁🏻♀️
Ya girl spent the last few months workin’ that 9 to 5 (well, 9 to 5.30) and let’s just say that took up a lot of my time.
Okay, I say that, yet I don’t even know where a lot of my time went. As far as I remember, weekends were spent doing all kinds of inconsequential yet essential crap like cleaning, buying groceries, doing the laundry and prepping meals.
Aaaand basically just recovering from the week.
Because maaaaan, the week was tough.
For some reason, work was pretty draining. I think part of it had to do with the emotional rollercoaster that is sales. Especially when deadlines and targets are looming.
When you’re having a good day, everything is going fine and it’s all roses and butterflies. When you’re having a not-so-good day, it gets frustrating, your mood takes a huge dip and you can feel the life getting sucked out of you. No joke.
It taught me a valuable lesson on how I deal with stressful situations and managing my mindset when things weren’t going so well.
Long story short, I couldn’t deal. On the surface, I hadn’t felt like I was stressed out, but my body was saying something different. I’d started experiencing really bad headaches outta nowhere and my heart would beat like crazy even when I was sitting down. 😦
When my doctor asked if I was stressed out, I was like
And because of those annoying headaches and overall crappy feeling that comes with
I’ve dealt with stressful situations before. I mean like c’mon, I’ve done uni for five years now and that shit gets stressful. So this was something very unexpected.
Reflecting on it now, maybe it was just an outer sign that I was dying on the inside. My days were being dictated by my work schedule and I wasn’t in the headspace to be thinking about my dreams and goals. My passions, hobbies and other fun stuff I used to do took a back seat.
I was still learning new things and meeting up with people, but I hadn’t managed to do anything substantial to move forward towards my goals. So I guess that lack of progress was kinda frustrating.
I reckon it wasn’t so much the fact that it was a 9-5 gig that threw me off, it was the fact that I didn’t feel like my work had a purpose. My first few sales were really exciting… and then they just became yet another transaction. I’d have great conversations with people, then they’d buy, and then I’d never talk to them again. The whole process just made me feel… kinda empty.
It was just as well that I couldn’t continue in the role thanks to unexpected stuff cropping up with uni. I think the job might’ve been destroying my soul and my body was trying to tell me that by showing all these ridiculous symptoms that I’d never had before.
Ever since I finished up, I haven’t had any more headaches and can finally go hard at the gym again — in fact, harder than I’ve ever gone before. That must be saying something.
Having said that, I’m really grateful for this chapter of my life as I absolutely loved my fun and hilarious colleagues, and I learned a lot about the mortgage broking industry and how to manage the sales process.
I also learned a lot about myself. Perhaps I’m not suited to process-driven, repetitive and transactional work because I love connecting with people on a deeper level. But I wouldn’t have known that if I hadn’t given it a shot.
I also learned that I really value my freedom and would give up money in order to get my time back. It’s funny because I thought that achieving financial independence would give me freedom. But I ended up with more money than I needed and no time to figure out what to do with it.
Moving forward, I’m still going to explore different things to discover my strengths and weaknesses, what I like and don’t like. And I’m going to invest more time in planning for my financial future.
Life is such a wonderful adventure… and I’m ready to embark on my next journey. ✌